Mohammad or Muhammad is the most common name in the world. It is also the most sacred name for an entire religion. We have had some really great and famous people with this name; the Prophet being the most celebrated.
Mohammad Ali the Boxing Legend, Mohammad Rafi the Indian music Maestro, Qaid-E-Azam Mohammad Ali Jinnah the founder of Pakistan, Mohammad Bin Tughlaq the Maniacal Genius, Mohammad Ghauri and Mohammad of Ghazni are / were some hugely famous names.
In a country that perhaps hosts the largest number of Mohammads, Two Mohammads who could have been the stars of a brave new world; have instead brought a country and a game to disrepute beyond dispute.
When the reports first came, I wasn't surprised. Every time their brittle batting collapses, we are forced to listen to these "Fixing" stories. It was like listening to an old broken record. But as more skeletons started to tumble out, I was devastated.
Mohammad Aamer is such a precocious and precious talent, I had almost started to adore him. Mohammad Asif in spite of his inglorious behavior in the past was an exceptionally talented pacer.
Both these guys could have forged a long term and deadly pace combination to take Pakistan Cricket to new heights. And then they did this !
Monday, August 30, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Ravindra Jadeja for President !
Looking at the selection policies of Indian Selectors lead by Sri-Can't, I am tempted to make this suggestion. We should select and elect Ravindra Jadeja for the post of President of India.
Why ?
Here are the 5 points in support of Jadeja for President !
1] Ornamental to the Core: The post of President of India is an ornamental one. But for the great A. P. J. Abdul Kalam, they have been mostly rubber stamps. Shane Warne's Rock Star is of ornamental use to Team India. If any doubts persist, just click on the links and see how Yusuf Pathan, the man dropped for inconsistency fares when it comes to team's needs. Compare that with Ravindra Jadeja who has played mostly self serving Cricket all through !
2] Pathan is too straight: Like his lofted shots, Pathan is too simple and too straight. Only those with the ability to scheme and with right connections get to become President of India. Jadeja at the tender age of 21 showed he can swallow for breakfast, the entire gigantic figure of Yusuf Pathan who just can't scheme to save his life or that of his half brother.
3] Strike rate vs Average: BCCI Selectors go by Cricket Ratings which give higher points to averages than strike rates. An average of 22 with a strike rate of 103 is inconsistent. An average of 31 with strike rate of 77 runs per 100 balls is what the ODI Team needs; according to our Selectors. Dhoni has consistently underestimated and underutilized Yusuf. Shane Warne's dark-horse unfortunately has become Dhoni's darned ass !
4] Long Rope and Tight Rope: Let me admit Jadeja has better credentials in the bowling department. Has better economy, average and strike rate. But then he has bowled lot more than the poor Yusuf who has often been used in the power plays and then confined to the third man boundary. Players like Jadeja, Nohit Sharma and I shan't Sharma get the long rope while Yusuf always has to do the tight rope walking.
5] Selectors think Pathans are from Afghanistan: The Selectors perhaps think the Pathans are from Afghanistan. How else can we explain a guy like Irfan Pathan not even getting a chance in second string or third string teams when we see rank new comers making merry ? That only means one thing. In spite of very ordinary performances and self-serving Cricket, Jaddu will continue to rule.
He continues to rule without accountability. Is it not the greatest quality required for an Indian Politician ? So His Excellency Ravindrasinh Anirudhsinh Jadeja deserves to serve India as the President ! Period !
Why ?
Here are the 5 points in support of Jadeja for President !
1] Ornamental to the Core: The post of President of India is an ornamental one. But for the great A. P. J. Abdul Kalam, they have been mostly rubber stamps. Shane Warne's Rock Star is of ornamental use to Team India. If any doubts persist, just click on the links and see how Yusuf Pathan, the man dropped for inconsistency fares when it comes to team's needs. Compare that with Ravindra Jadeja who has played mostly self serving Cricket all through !
2] Pathan is too straight: Like his lofted shots, Pathan is too simple and too straight. Only those with the ability to scheme and with right connections get to become President of India. Jadeja at the tender age of 21 showed he can swallow for breakfast, the entire gigantic figure of Yusuf Pathan who just can't scheme to save his life or that of his half brother.
3] Strike rate vs Average: BCCI Selectors go by Cricket Ratings which give higher points to averages than strike rates. An average of 22 with a strike rate of 103 is inconsistent. An average of 31 with strike rate of 77 runs per 100 balls is what the ODI Team needs; according to our Selectors. Dhoni has consistently underestimated and underutilized Yusuf. Shane Warne's dark-horse unfortunately has become Dhoni's darned ass !
4] Long Rope and Tight Rope: Let me admit Jadeja has better credentials in the bowling department. Has better economy, average and strike rate. But then he has bowled lot more than the poor Yusuf who has often been used in the power plays and then confined to the third man boundary. Players like Jadeja, Nohit Sharma and I shan't Sharma get the long rope while Yusuf always has to do the tight rope walking.
5] Selectors think Pathans are from Afghanistan: The Selectors perhaps think the Pathans are from Afghanistan. How else can we explain a guy like Irfan Pathan not even getting a chance in second string or third string teams when we see rank new comers making merry ? That only means one thing. In spite of very ordinary performances and self-serving Cricket, Jaddu will continue to rule.
He continues to rule without accountability. Is it not the greatest quality required for an Indian Politician ? So His Excellency Ravindrasinh Anirudhsinh Jadeja deserves to serve India as the President ! Period !
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Randiv isn't the first !
After expressing my anger against Suraj Randiv on Facebook and Gmail buzz, I went through many a blogs and articles. I now feel all of us have over-reacted; Viru, his favorite Captain Dada, Bedi as usual and most of us Indians have !
Yes, it wasn't exactly a sporting act by Randiv. But he isn't the first to do so. Sri Lankans have a proven track record here. Hence targeting a young bowler is unacceptable. If someone has to answer, it has to be the man at the helm. We very well know he is not very fond of seeing India at the top the Test Championship table.
Amidst all the cacophony, one former Indian Star has talked some sense. Randiv or Sri Lankans are not the only culprits. India too have done this before ! I am surprised but also admire the courage and integrity shown by Mr. Chandu Borde.
I remember an incident from South Indian filmdom. Malayalee girl Nayan Tara made her debut as a girl next door in Malayalam. But once she crossed over to Chennai and started acting in Tamil movies, she shed quite a few pounds and a lot of cloths too. She got rid of her middle class inhibitions and did a few bold scenes with her friend Chimbu.
Men like me didn't mind a bit ! But the Malayalee crowd over-reacted to this and she was castigated by the prudish Mallu middle class. A hurt Nayan came out with a statement, "I haven't done anything that wasn't done by anyone in the past". She was right !
Instead of offering an apology to Sehwag, Randiv too could have told, "I haven't done anything that wasn't done by anyone in the past". He hasn't done that and we should admire that.
A famous statement of Manoj Prabhakar comes back to haunt me, "Is Hamam me saare nange hain". Those who live in glass houses don't throw stones ! India should forget and get over this incident. Let us move on !
Yes, it wasn't exactly a sporting act by Randiv. But he isn't the first to do so. Sri Lankans have a proven track record here. Hence targeting a young bowler is unacceptable. If someone has to answer, it has to be the man at the helm. We very well know he is not very fond of seeing India at the top the Test Championship table.
Amidst all the cacophony, one former Indian Star has talked some sense. Randiv or Sri Lankans are not the only culprits. India too have done this before ! I am surprised but also admire the courage and integrity shown by Mr. Chandu Borde.
What he said is this: "No team wants to allow a batsman to cross the century mark and all the teams in the world have succeeded on number of occasions in denying the batsman of a century. Even we Indians have followed this and never gave a freedom for the batsman to set a mark. It was a brilliant knock by Sehwag, he deserves all accolades," he said.
"I would not say it as 'not cricket'. Some people are generous to a fault but others, like the Australians, won't give you an easy hundred to take. There can be two opinions on this; whether Sri Lanka were unsporting or not.
"I remember (In Delhi in 1958-59 series) against the West Indies I had scored a century (109) in the first innings and was 96 batting in the second with fast bowler Roy Gilchrist repeatedly bowling bouncers at me. When two balls remained non-striker Vijay Manjrekar came and told me you have to get to the century. I hooked the next ball, it went for a four but I disturbed my wicket and was hit-wicket," he recalled.
"In the same match, we didn't allow Gary Sobers to get to his double hundred when he was on 199. It's part of the game. We Indians have also adopted such strategies. Even local cricket in India is played in that manner," he said.
Men like me didn't mind a bit ! But the Malayalee crowd over-reacted to this and she was castigated by the prudish Mallu middle class. A hurt Nayan came out with a statement, "I haven't done anything that wasn't done by anyone in the past". She was right !
Instead of offering an apology to Sehwag, Randiv too could have told, "I haven't done anything that wasn't done by anyone in the past". He hasn't done that and we should admire that.
A famous statement of Manoj Prabhakar comes back to haunt me, "Is Hamam me saare nange hain". Those who live in glass houses don't throw stones ! India should forget and get over this incident. Let us move on !
Sunday, August 8, 2010
A Story of the Silent Savior !
'Ramayan', the Indian Epic has always been about 'Ram' the Prince who spent 14 years in the wilderness to honor his father's words. So glorified has been Ram in Ramayan, an equally phenomenal character was completely sidelined as a sidekick. That was his unbelievably loyal younger brother who followed him throughout the travails, minus the wife !
There are many Heroes in real life. There indeed are many Heroes in most of the stories in 'Real' and 'Reel' Life. But somehow, we have a penchant for making 'One' an absolute Hero and all others the sidekicks. This has been the story of Indian Cricket for the past two decades. Ever since the 'Eleventh Incarnation of God' made his debut, this has been the case.
But Team India perched at the Top of Test Cricket Table has many Heroes. It is the collective effort of many men that has catapulted India to number 1 position.
This in no way should be seen as an effort to minimize the greatness of the most admired Indian Sportsman of all times. This is just my sincere tribute to the most stylish batsman since Mohammad Ahzaruddin.
In spite of a quite prolonged ongoing poor run of form, Rahul Dravid's determination at the batting crease has won us many a battles away from home.
One session of madness with a method is all Virendar Sehwag needs to change the fortunes of the team and demoralize opponents.
In the aftermath of the match-fixing scandals and amidst the ruins of away from home disasters, one man taught Team India to stand up and be counted among the best. And he was rightly called 'Dada' !
In a game dominated by batsmen in a country obsessed with batting records, there was a man with an elephantine appetite for wickets and success. He rightly was nicknamed 'Jumbo' !
Then there is the perennial 'Trouble-shooter' of Indian Cricket. Very few people remember he has played 116 tests. Still very few people remember he has scored over 7000 runs and 16 hundreds batting mostly with the lower order and tail for company.
In Ramayan, the invincible Indrajit could be slain by only a man who had practiced 14 years of celibacy. It was rightly the most dedicated man who could fell the most demanding of the villains. Laxman made Ram's job of conquering Lanka possible by getting Ravan's proud son out of the way.
Rewinding to circa 2010, Team India were not favored to beat Sri Lanka in Sri Lanka once Zaheer Khan was not available. Murali and the Lankan batsmen made India look ordinary in the first test. Second test was all about Batathons. In an evenly contested Third Test, in spite of Sangakkara's assertion, India showed why they still were the top dogs.
And then the man who has remained a silent achiever for most part of 14 years and done his bat do the talking; had to come to the rescue again. Veeru was gone for another of second innings failures. Dravid's defense had let him down and India were staring at a 2-0 series loss. Of course there was Sachin, but it was the absolutely subtle handling of spinners by Laxman which made the chase possible on the fifth day wicket.
India didn't exactly conquer Lanka. They haven't done it for over fifteen years now. But this series was believed to be lost once they were walloped in the first test and it needed a 'Laxman' to save the honor. Rightly so, who else could have done it in the land of Ravan but for Laxman !
The day his story is written, they can name it, Laxmanaayan; A Story of the Silent Savior !
There are many Heroes in real life. There indeed are many Heroes in most of the stories in 'Real' and 'Reel' Life. But somehow, we have a penchant for making 'One' an absolute Hero and all others the sidekicks. This has been the story of Indian Cricket for the past two decades. Ever since the 'Eleventh Incarnation of God' made his debut, this has been the case.
But Team India perched at the Top of Test Cricket Table has many Heroes. It is the collective effort of many men that has catapulted India to number 1 position.
This in no way should be seen as an effort to minimize the greatness of the most admired Indian Sportsman of all times. This is just my sincere tribute to the most stylish batsman since Mohammad Ahzaruddin.
In spite of a quite prolonged ongoing poor run of form, Rahul Dravid's determination at the batting crease has won us many a battles away from home.
One session of madness with a method is all Virendar Sehwag needs to change the fortunes of the team and demoralize opponents.
In the aftermath of the match-fixing scandals and amidst the ruins of away from home disasters, one man taught Team India to stand up and be counted among the best. And he was rightly called 'Dada' !
In a game dominated by batsmen in a country obsessed with batting records, there was a man with an elephantine appetite for wickets and success. He rightly was nicknamed 'Jumbo' !
Then there is the perennial 'Trouble-shooter' of Indian Cricket. Very few people remember he has played 116 tests. Still very few people remember he has scored over 7000 runs and 16 hundreds batting mostly with the lower order and tail for company.
In Ramayan, the invincible Indrajit could be slain by only a man who had practiced 14 years of celibacy. It was rightly the most dedicated man who could fell the most demanding of the villains. Laxman made Ram's job of conquering Lanka possible by getting Ravan's proud son out of the way.
Rewinding to circa 2010, Team India were not favored to beat Sri Lanka in Sri Lanka once Zaheer Khan was not available. Murali and the Lankan batsmen made India look ordinary in the first test. Second test was all about Batathons. In an evenly contested Third Test, in spite of Sangakkara's assertion, India showed why they still were the top dogs.
And then the man who has remained a silent achiever for most part of 14 years and done his bat do the talking; had to come to the rescue again. Veeru was gone for another of second innings failures. Dravid's defense had let him down and India were staring at a 2-0 series loss. Of course there was Sachin, but it was the absolutely subtle handling of spinners by Laxman which made the chase possible on the fifth day wicket.
India didn't exactly conquer Lanka. They haven't done it for over fifteen years now. But this series was believed to be lost once they were walloped in the first test and it needed a 'Laxman' to save the honor. Rightly so, who else could have done it in the land of Ravan but for Laxman !
The day his story is written, they can name it, Laxmanaayan; A Story of the Silent Savior !
Thursday, July 29, 2010
India - Sri Lanka Test Cricket; Paul Predicts !
I went to Facebook to ask Paul the Octopus about future of Indian Cricket and he gave me this report !
India Sri Lanka third test drawn. Sri Lanka retain the Rubber they won in 2010.
Colombo, 1 April 2013: Third Test between India and Sri Lanka drawn. Replying to India's first innings score of 1002 / 4 Declared, Sri Lanka made 1278 / 3 at Tea on Day-5. This is the 14th successive drawn test between the two countries since the Candy Test win for Sri Lanka in 2010.
Play was called off because all the Indian bowlers were exhausted. Ishant Sharma, Harbhajan Singh and Pragyan Ojha were admitted to a Colombo Hospital for saline infusions. Harbhajan Singh, who went wicket-less in the series announced his decision to retire from Test Cricket from the hospital bed.
Virendar Sehwag set a new record for bowling maximum number of overs in an innings by a non-regular bowler. His figures of 57-0-209-0 were the most economical in the test.
Mahela Jayavardene broke his own record for the highest score in a test innings. He had made 416 in the previous drawn test at Candy. Here he scored 432 not out with the help of 57 fours and 7 sixes.
This is the first occasion when three batsmen scored over 300 runs in a test. Earlier Sehwag had scored 307 and Kumar Sangakkara had made 301 before he was run out by India's fifteenth man Amit Mishra. India had 4 substitute fielders on field for most part of day-5.
India made a request to the Umpires to allow anyone from the galleries to field for them. Umpires did not allow this request. But they allowed Coach Gary Kirsten to substitute for substitute fielder Murali Vijay who collapsed at the long-leg boundary.
Sri Lanka Captain wanted the Umpires to allow India to use their substitute bowlers to bowl so that Mahela could complete his 500. But the Umpires refused citing the ICC guidelines which allowed only the first 11 players to bowl.
Jayavardene won the Man of the Match award. He was also declared the Man of the Series for scoring a monumental 1013 runs in the 3 test series. This is an all-time record. He also held three catches that were offered by Indian batsmen in the whole series and was declared the Best Fielder.
Sachin Tendulkar added 2 more centuries to his kitty to record 63 Test hundreds. His tally of runs now stands at 17683 runs form 198 Tests. Cricket enthusiasts are now waiting eagerly for his 200th test. He is expected to reach the milestone against Sri Lanka later this year at Kanpur on 9 May 2013.
Suraj Randiv won the Best Bowler of the series for picking up 6 wickets in the series. This is the first time a bowler has managed to take more than 5 wickets in a 3 test series between India and Sri Lanka since Muralidharan retired in July 2010.
Zaheer Khan who missed the entire series due to a groin injury, announced his retirement from his home in Mumbai. He made a passionate plea to the ICC to allow substitute bowlers to bowl in Test matches to prevent further bowler burnouts.
He cited the premature retirements of Srisanth, R. P. Singh, Munaf Patel and R Ashwin after the previous India - Sri Lanka series. He also pointed out Lasith Malinga's decision to play only T-20 Cricket in future; which was due to repeated injuries suffered playing Test Cricket on subcontinental pitches.
Sunil Gavaskar, Ravi Shastri, Gary Kirsten and Arjuna Ranatunga have extended strong support to Zaheer Khan's suggestion. But Bishen Singh Bedi pooh poohed this suggestion and said bowlers were getting lazy these days. He said Harbhajan' s retirement was good riddance of a Chucker. He wanted the ICC to order bowlers to bowl without bending arms, legs or any part of their anatomy in future.
Sanath Jayasuriya made it clear that he was not going to retire any time soon and will play on till his body permitted. He said he was hopeful of making a comeback during the next series to be played in India. He expected his experience to come handy on a tough tour of India.
Who will retire first? Rahul, Sachin or Sanath ? Log onto our website and cast your votes. Or Type (RAH) for Dravid or (SAC) for Tendulkar or for (SAN) Jayasuriya on your mobile and send to 01042013 !
India Sri Lanka third test drawn. Sri Lanka retain the Rubber they won in 2010.
Colombo, 1 April 2013: Third Test between India and Sri Lanka drawn. Replying to India's first innings score of 1002 / 4 Declared, Sri Lanka made 1278 / 3 at Tea on Day-5. This is the 14th successive drawn test between the two countries since the Candy Test win for Sri Lanka in 2010.
Play was called off because all the Indian bowlers were exhausted. Ishant Sharma, Harbhajan Singh and Pragyan Ojha were admitted to a Colombo Hospital for saline infusions. Harbhajan Singh, who went wicket-less in the series announced his decision to retire from Test Cricket from the hospital bed.
Virendar Sehwag set a new record for bowling maximum number of overs in an innings by a non-regular bowler. His figures of 57-0-209-0 were the most economical in the test.
Mahela Jayavardene broke his own record for the highest score in a test innings. He had made 416 in the previous drawn test at Candy. Here he scored 432 not out with the help of 57 fours and 7 sixes.
This is the first occasion when three batsmen scored over 300 runs in a test. Earlier Sehwag had scored 307 and Kumar Sangakkara had made 301 before he was run out by India's fifteenth man Amit Mishra. India had 4 substitute fielders on field for most part of day-5.
India made a request to the Umpires to allow anyone from the galleries to field for them. Umpires did not allow this request. But they allowed Coach Gary Kirsten to substitute for substitute fielder Murali Vijay who collapsed at the long-leg boundary.
Sri Lanka Captain wanted the Umpires to allow India to use their substitute bowlers to bowl so that Mahela could complete his 500. But the Umpires refused citing the ICC guidelines which allowed only the first 11 players to bowl.
Jayavardene won the Man of the Match award. He was also declared the Man of the Series for scoring a monumental 1013 runs in the 3 test series. This is an all-time record. He also held three catches that were offered by Indian batsmen in the whole series and was declared the Best Fielder.
Sachin Tendulkar added 2 more centuries to his kitty to record 63 Test hundreds. His tally of runs now stands at 17683 runs form 198 Tests. Cricket enthusiasts are now waiting eagerly for his 200th test. He is expected to reach the milestone against Sri Lanka later this year at Kanpur on 9 May 2013.
Suraj Randiv won the Best Bowler of the series for picking up 6 wickets in the series. This is the first time a bowler has managed to take more than 5 wickets in a 3 test series between India and Sri Lanka since Muralidharan retired in July 2010.
Zaheer Khan who missed the entire series due to a groin injury, announced his retirement from his home in Mumbai. He made a passionate plea to the ICC to allow substitute bowlers to bowl in Test matches to prevent further bowler burnouts.
He cited the premature retirements of Srisanth, R. P. Singh, Munaf Patel and R Ashwin after the previous India - Sri Lanka series. He also pointed out Lasith Malinga's decision to play only T-20 Cricket in future; which was due to repeated injuries suffered playing Test Cricket on subcontinental pitches.
Sunil Gavaskar, Ravi Shastri, Gary Kirsten and Arjuna Ranatunga have extended strong support to Zaheer Khan's suggestion. But Bishen Singh Bedi pooh poohed this suggestion and said bowlers were getting lazy these days. He said Harbhajan' s retirement was good riddance of a Chucker. He wanted the ICC to order bowlers to bowl without bending arms, legs or any part of their anatomy in future.
Sanath Jayasuriya made it clear that he was not going to retire any time soon and will play on till his body permitted. He said he was hopeful of making a comeback during the next series to be played in India. He expected his experience to come handy on a tough tour of India.
Who will retire first? Rahul, Sachin or Sanath ? Log onto our website and cast your votes. Or Type (RAH)
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
A Revolutionary Idea for the Revival of Pakistan Cricket!
As the Indian cookie is crumbling in Galle, Pakistan players are basking in the glory of the support they received in England during their T-20 Series win. Clearly the Aussies are more unpopular than we ever imagined. We know almost 99% of Indians and 100% of Sri Lankans hate them. But even the Poms? Who says there is 'Racism' in Cricket?
There was an interesting suggestion to Pakistan Selectors on BCCI blog that I have come to enjoy these days. This inspired me for a further innovated suggestion. The question is will the PCB buy this?
There is a system in my daughter's school. Every single student in the class will be made the monitor for a fixed period. They will give the schedule in advance and the kids are a happy lot. Thus the brilliant and the bullies can't take others for a ride. Absolute democracy. Hope the forever budding democracy that Pakistan is; they will like this idea!
Everyone in Pakistan team deserves to get Captaincy. It is such a shame the Greatest Show Pony of Pakistan Cricket has not got his due. Shoib Actor, I mean Aqthar should get the Captaincy once Salman Butt decides to retire after the next series.
So Pakistan Selectors should try Captaincy by rotation. One Captain for every month of a year. The twelfth man can become Captain in December. More number of players can be accommodated in the next Calender year.
Getting a second or third chance at Captaincy depends upon your talent, performance, consistency, longevity and of course the clout with PCB. This will encourage and even force every player to play well under every Captain. You always know the guy under whom you are playing today will play under you some day. Thus Pakistan Cricket will get better and better.
And most importantly, this will help us break the sequence of Pakistan Captains going into premature retirement; one after the other. Shoib Malik got married and has started to work as a 'Ball Boy' to Sania. Mohammad Yusuf has retired for the time being. Yunis Khan doesn't even know if and when he retired. Afridi has retired at a tender age of 24 years. Right now, we are waiting for Salman Butt to retire!
Please, Please and Please, Mr. Ijaz Butt; consider this suggestion and save Pakistan Cricket. I believe in the 'Love thy Neighbor' principle. We all love Pakistan Cricket, Shoib Aqthar, Sania Mirza and even Shoib Malik! I am not even asking for Intellectual Property Rights of this idea. We want Pakistan Cricket to flourish, otherwise where will we have Characters like Afridi and Actor Miyan?
There was an interesting suggestion to Pakistan Selectors on BCCI blog that I have come to enjoy these days. This inspired me for a further innovated suggestion. The question is will the PCB buy this?
There is a system in my daughter's school. Every single student in the class will be made the monitor for a fixed period. They will give the schedule in advance and the kids are a happy lot. Thus the brilliant and the bullies can't take others for a ride. Absolute democracy. Hope the forever budding democracy that Pakistan is; they will like this idea!
Everyone in Pakistan team deserves to get Captaincy. It is such a shame the Greatest Show Pony of Pakistan Cricket has not got his due. Shoib Actor, I mean Aqthar should get the Captaincy once Salman Butt decides to retire after the next series.
So Pakistan Selectors should try Captaincy by rotation. One Captain for every month of a year. The twelfth man can become Captain in December. More number of players can be accommodated in the next Calender year.
Getting a second or third chance at Captaincy depends upon your talent, performance, consistency, longevity and of course the clout with PCB. This will encourage and even force every player to play well under every Captain. You always know the guy under whom you are playing today will play under you some day. Thus Pakistan Cricket will get better and better.
And most importantly, this will help us break the sequence of Pakistan Captains going into premature retirement; one after the other. Shoib Malik got married and has started to work as a 'Ball Boy' to Sania. Mohammad Yusuf has retired for the time being. Yunis Khan doesn't even know if and when he retired. Afridi has retired at a tender age of 24 years. Right now, we are waiting for Salman Butt to retire!
Please, Please and Please, Mr. Ijaz Butt; consider this suggestion and save Pakistan Cricket. I believe in the 'Love thy Neighbor' principle. We all love Pakistan Cricket, Shoib Aqthar, Sania Mirza and even Shoib Malik! I am not even asking for Intellectual Property Rights of this idea. We want Pakistan Cricket to flourish, otherwise where will we have Characters like Afridi and Actor Miyan?
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Pakistan; A Team of Ex-Captains !
Pakistan will play the 2011 World Cup with the unbeatable record of having 11 Ex-Captains in their playing 11. Any team in future can only equal this record, never be able to break it !
Well, unless the ICC decides to bring back the Super Sub. Even in that event, only Pakistan stands with a chance to break their own record. No other team in the world of Cricket can manage to muster so many Captains !
How will this happen ?
The story unfolds thus...
Shahid Afridi has resigned and has tipped Salman Butt to succeed him.
Salman Butt will lead in next two matches. As is a recent convention with Pakistan Cricket, he has to retire and then come back just before the World Cup, simply because it is played in India. Butt loves Indian pitches.
Shoib Aqthar will be the next Captain. He will demand for the Captain's Cap because every other player has had one. But he will be banned for 2 weeks and 6 days by PCB for misbehavior with team-mates. He will be recalled before the WC.
Umar Gul will replace Aqthar for one ODI and will suffer a hairline fracture somewhere in his body.
PCB will then support a Wicket Keeper Captain in Kamran Akmal since other two Asian teams have one. Akmal will drop all the catches due to distraction of Captaincy. He is dropping them even without it. He will be forced resign from Captaincy halfway through a match due to rebellion by 9 other players.
As a compromise formula, his little brother Umar Akmal will take over for the rest of the match.
Imran Farhat will accept Captaincy because PCB will tell him he can be accommodated in the playing 11 only as a Captain. As is his wont, he will goof up his chance and will be sacked after the first match.
India - Pakistan talks are failing and both sides are hurling verbal missiles at each other. Pakistan President Asif Ali Zardari wants to show how fair they are to the Minority Hindus in Pakistan. So he asks PCB to appoint Danesh Kaneria as Captain. His tenure as Captain will be cut short due to serious riots in Rawalpindi, rumored to have been triggered by intemperate comments by the 'Rawalpindi Express'.
When the going gets tough, the puff gets going. Mohammad Asif is the best fast-bowler in the subcontinent today. Nobody doubts his action. The problem is with his actions, away from the oval. He will Captain for one match and then take a break to attend to court cases regarding the Narcotics case.
Since there will be no one else willing to take up Captaincy, Mohammad Amer will be made the Pakistan Captain for the 2011 World Cup. Wasim Akram believes Amer is smarter than Wasim himself was at 18. Isn't it good enough reason for him to be made the Captain ?
Since the batting cupboard is so empty, all the usual suspects will make a comeback. They all will join hands to save the prestige of their Country !
Thus the playing 11 will be...
1] Salman Butt [Ex-Captain by Chance]
2] Shahid Afridi [Ex-Captain by Choice]
3] Yunis Khan [Ex-Reluctant Captain]
4] Shoib Malik [Ex-Unpopular Captain]
5] Umar Akmal [Ex-Compromise Captain]
6] Mohammad Yusuf [Ex-Retired Captain]
7] Kamran Akmal [Ex-Dropped Captain]
8] Mohammad Asif [Ex-Doped Captain]
9] Shoib Aqthar [Ex-Doomed Captain]
10] Mohammad Amer [Ex-Captain in waiting]
11] Danesh Kaneria [Ex-Rioted Captain]
The 15 member team will be completed by Umar Gul [Ex-Injured Captain], Imran Farhat [Ex-Captain forever] and two more 'Future Ex-Captains'!
Now beat this if you can !
Well, unless the ICC decides to bring back the Super Sub. Even in that event, only Pakistan stands with a chance to break their own record. No other team in the world of Cricket can manage to muster so many Captains !
How will this happen ?
The story unfolds thus...
Shahid Afridi has resigned and has tipped Salman Butt to succeed him.
Salman Butt will lead in next two matches. As is a recent convention with Pakistan Cricket, he has to retire and then come back just before the World Cup, simply because it is played in India. Butt loves Indian pitches.
Shoib Aqthar will be the next Captain. He will demand for the Captain's Cap because every other player has had one. But he will be banned for 2 weeks and 6 days by PCB for misbehavior with team-mates. He will be recalled before the WC.
Umar Gul will replace Aqthar for one ODI and will suffer a hairline fracture somewhere in his body.
PCB will then support a Wicket Keeper Captain in Kamran Akmal since other two Asian teams have one. Akmal will drop all the catches due to distraction of Captaincy. He is dropping them even without it. He will be forced resign from Captaincy halfway through a match due to rebellion by 9 other players.
As a compromise formula, his little brother Umar Akmal will take over for the rest of the match.
Imran Farhat will accept Captaincy because PCB will tell him he can be accommodated in the playing 11 only as a Captain. As is his wont, he will goof up his chance and will be sacked after the first match.
India - Pakistan talks are failing and both sides are hurling verbal missiles at each other. Pakistan President Asif Ali Zardari wants to show how fair they are to the Minority Hindus in Pakistan. So he asks PCB to appoint Danesh Kaneria as Captain. His tenure as Captain will be cut short due to serious riots in Rawalpindi, rumored to have been triggered by intemperate comments by the 'Rawalpindi Express'.
When the going gets tough, the puff gets going. Mohammad Asif is the best fast-bowler in the subcontinent today. Nobody doubts his action. The problem is with his actions, away from the oval. He will Captain for one match and then take a break to attend to court cases regarding the Narcotics case.
Since there will be no one else willing to take up Captaincy, Mohammad Amer will be made the Pakistan Captain for the 2011 World Cup. Wasim Akram believes Amer is smarter than Wasim himself was at 18. Isn't it good enough reason for him to be made the Captain ?
Since the batting cupboard is so empty, all the usual suspects will make a comeback. They all will join hands to save the prestige of their Country !
Thus the playing 11 will be...
1] Salman Butt [Ex-Captain by Chance]
2] Shahid Afridi [Ex-Captain by Choice]
3] Yunis Khan [Ex-Reluctant Captain]
4] Shoib Malik [Ex-Unpopular Captain]
5] Umar Akmal [Ex-Compromise Captain]
6] Mohammad Yusuf [Ex-Retired Captain]
7] Kamran Akmal [Ex-Dropped Captain]
8] Mohammad Asif [Ex-Doped Captain]
9] Shoib Aqthar [Ex-Doomed Captain]
10] Mohammad Amer [Ex-Captain in waiting]
11] Danesh Kaneria [Ex-Rioted Captain]
The 15 member team will be completed by Umar Gul [Ex-Injured Captain], Imran Farhat [Ex-Captain forever] and two more 'Future Ex-Captains'!
Now beat this if you can !
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Especially sickened by the overdose of India – Sri Lanka Cricket, I was looking at Pakistan – England series as the tonic for my Cricketing brains !
The Cricketing World would have been at their feet in no time. Name, Fame, Fortune and big bucks would have followed them without any delay.
Why ? Why did they do it ? When it looked as if we were witnessing a resurgence of Pakistan Cricket in general and fast bowling of unbridled passion in particular. WHY ?
Both these guys have now joined in ignominy another Mohammad, who confessed, "Maine Match Banaaya".
It hurts to be an Indian who supports Pakistan Cricket. It lacerates when something like this happens. I can't even imagine how the flood hit and devastated Pakistani supporters must be feeling.
Betrayal is an understatement !