My last post was my most serious ever. That emanated from the fact that I am depressed with the way Team India have struggled during this cup. But looking back, I gave India no chances of winning at all.
From the day Munaf got that Man of the Match award in South Africa, I knew India were doomed. Why do I believe so ? Just look at our opponents from that series. South Africa are playing this cup without the man who got more wickets and bowled much better than Munaf during the same match and the same series.
Why do I dislike Munaf Patel ? As much as the Team members, Captain and Selectors repose faith in him, I strongly believe Munaf is not the guy we need in our campaign if we want to win. And why do I 'believe' so ? Let us look at Munaf's repertory.
What He is: Decent line and length bowler. Can keep it in the corridor with the new ball.
What He ain't: At best a trundler. No Pace. No Yorker. No Bouncer. Not much Reverse Swing. Regularly bowls length balls at death. Can't run to save his own life or that of his wife. Batting is a single digit lottery; you win once in one million chances.
How can India depend on a bowler who depends upon the pressure created at the other end or by huge scores to survive ? He has got 9 wickets to his credit so far. But at what cost ? Except the Bangladesh match, he has consistently gone for runs when it mattered the most. People remember Nehra went for 13 runs in the last over. But they have forgotten Munaf went for 14 in the 48th over against Saffers. He also bowled a pathetic last over against England.
Unfortunately the wise men in the garbs of Selectors left Team India with no other options. Dhoni's zeal for Piyush Chawla is tough to understand. That boy hasn't played any meaningful ODI Cricket for ages. The selectors should have known with the "Handle with Care" tag that both Ashish and Zaheer come, we should have had one more Pacer in the 15 member army.
Piyush Chawla will go down in the history as the costliest blunder ever by a bunch of Selectors. I am not being wise in retrospection. I have from the beginning believed Nehra, Munaf and Piyush were misfits and said so.
We are now facing a possibility of a second successive first round exit at the World Cup. Many people believe India have already qualified for the Quarters. But that is far from true. There are so many possibilities.
Imagine England beat West Indies by a big margin tonight. West Indies then rout India on Sunday, again with a big margin. And Bangladesh upset Saffers, India will probably be pipped to the post by England. How do we like that ? Though there are a lot of ifs, it isn't impossible.
And if that happens, we needn't worry about our combination for the next round. Our highest paid players can straightaway start preparations for IPL-4. There is some relief. Only an Indian Team will win IPL, come what may !
What is the Carry Home message ?
Australia have Lee, Johnson and Tait; all doing well.
Saffers have Steyn and Morkel, the best pair in the business today.
England have a ready Pace replacement for every Pace bowler that gets injured.
Pakistan have Aqthar, Gul and Riaz and a factory of Fast bowlers.
Sri Lanka have Malinga and a bunch of disciplined medium pacers.
West Indies have Roach, Russel and a number of support bowlers.
New Zealand have Southee, Mills, Franklin and many slow medium pacers.
What do India have ?
Zaheer Khan !
Don't even mention Nehra and Munaf. We already have seen them, discussed them and done with. Sreesanth ? He doesn't have the confidence of his own Captain.
So the situation is simple...
No Pace = No Peace !
That is "The End" !
SPun Doctor
Showing posts with label Chawla. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chawla. Show all posts
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Yuckmal and other World Cup Trivia - Part-1
The Cricket World Cup is on and I landed back on Terra Firma with a resounding thud this evening. My second favorite team was Kamraned initially and then Taylored. From then it went all Southee-wards. So now we have some fun on the KumRun and Pakistan is back to being Pakistan.
Shoaib Aqthar recommended for Nobel Peace Prize. For not mugging Yuckmal.
People are unnecessarily being harsh on Kakmal. He confessed to his younger brother that he was just being nice to the Birthday Boy. But he is cut up with Taylor for not reciprocating the gesture.
Bollywood stunt masters have used boxing gloves, hockey sticks, stumps and even a basketball to wreck violence on celluloid. They now have added an exciting new weapon, "The Groin Protector" !
Bangladesh fans believed their team was full of 'Rock Stars'. But the team played as if they belonged to the 'Stone age'. So the 'Stones Rocked' and there was a Gayle storm on Twitter.
Piyush Chawla is taking his batting seriously. Well, who is taking his bowling seriously ?
Dhoni planning to promote Yusuf in the batting order. Then which position will he win matches from any position ?
Munaf Patel lauded by Dhoni for a fine effort in the field. He managed to beat the ball to the fence and picked it outside the ropes.
Ashish Nehra fit to play. He actually walked from the Team Bus to the ground on his own legs.
Sreesanth heard talking to a friend about cutting a music CD. Dhoni mistook it for LCD and gave Sree a public dressing down.
The Pepsi ad is doomed. 'Palti hit' has herniated. 'Upar Cut' isn't going Upar enough. 'Doosra' is missing in action. 'Pallu scoop' isn't Dilshining. Most importantly the 'Helicopter' hasn't taken wings and the 'Fan' is stuck.
But Indian Captain has rejected outright, the theory that he has lost the flair. Dhoni explained, "Helicopter is also called Chopper. You all must have noticed I am chopping a lot these days. So you still can watch me play 'Chopper Shots'. In the end, we all mature over a period of time"
Kohli is the newest addition to the 'Atheists' gang. He Viratified the Sachin LBW verdict and then asked the God to take a walk !
South Africa have rubbished the reports that they choked against England. Smith said, "We played our natural game and will continue to do so in future" !
Afridi is reported to be upset and asked Umar Gul, "How could you get How out ?". Jamie How made 4 runs of 29 balls with a striking strike rate of 13.79.
Umar Gul took the only catch in the New Zealand innings. All other catches went in One direction.
"Our bowling is weak" say Indian experts. An in depth analysis has revealed the reason. All our batsmen are on some kind of energy boosters. Like Sachin on Boost. But none of the bowlers are on anything. That explains Yuveraj's new found vigor. He has been "Revitalized" !
I just noticed I have completed a Century on "Doctoring the Balls". But to prevent this post from becoming a calamity like the 47th over of New Zealand innings, I declare here. I will come back, as random as random comes !
SPun Doctor
Here is a random look at some of the trivia from the action up till now.
It is reported that 'KumRun' Akmal finally 'caught' something. Well, it turned out to be a stomach bug. And he 'dropped' again; this time in his pants ! His team-mates now call him Yuckmal ! |
| Finally... He caught something ! |
Shoaib Aqthar recommended for Nobel Peace Prize. For not mugging Yuckmal.
People are unnecessarily being harsh on Kakmal. He confessed to his younger brother that he was just being nice to the Birthday Boy. But he is cut up with Taylor for not reciprocating the gesture.
Bollywood stunt masters have used boxing gloves, hockey sticks, stumps and even a basketball to wreck violence on celluloid. They now have added an exciting new weapon, "The Groin Protector" !
Bangladesh fans believed their team was full of 'Rock Stars'. But the team played as if they belonged to the 'Stone age'. So the 'Stones Rocked' and there was a Gayle storm on Twitter.
Piyush Chawla is taking his batting seriously. Well, who is taking his bowling seriously ?
Dhoni planning to promote Yusuf in the batting order. Then which position will he win matches from any position ?
Munaf Patel lauded by Dhoni for a fine effort in the field. He managed to beat the ball to the fence and picked it outside the ropes.
Ashish Nehra fit to play. He actually walked from the Team Bus to the ground on his own legs.
Sreesanth heard talking to a friend about cutting a music CD. Dhoni mistook it for LCD and gave Sree a public dressing down.
The Pepsi ad is doomed. 'Palti hit' has herniated. 'Upar Cut' isn't going Upar enough. 'Doosra' is missing in action. 'Pallu scoop' isn't Dilshining. Most importantly the 'Helicopter' hasn't taken wings and the 'Fan' is stuck.
But Indian Captain has rejected outright, the theory that he has lost the flair. Dhoni explained, "Helicopter is also called Chopper. You all must have noticed I am chopping a lot these days. So you still can watch me play 'Chopper Shots'. In the end, we all mature over a period of time"
Kohli is the newest addition to the 'Atheists' gang. He Viratified the Sachin LBW verdict and then asked the God to take a walk !
South Africa have rubbished the reports that they choked against England. Smith said, "We played our natural game and will continue to do so in future" !
Afridi is reported to be upset and asked Umar Gul, "How could you get How out ?". Jamie How made 4 runs of 29 balls with a striking strike rate of 13.79.
Umar Gul took the only catch in the New Zealand innings. All other catches went in One direction.
"Our bowling is weak" say Indian experts. An in depth analysis has revealed the reason. All our batsmen are on some kind of energy boosters. Like Sachin on Boost. But none of the bowlers are on anything. That explains Yuveraj's new found vigor. He has been "Revitalized" !
I just noticed I have completed a Century on "Doctoring the Balls". But to prevent this post from becoming a calamity like the 47th over of New Zealand innings, I declare here. I will come back, as random as random comes !
SPun Doctor
Monday, February 14, 2011
Maheadlines in the times of World Cup !
Weird things do happen in Cricket. They just keep happening. More so during the World Cup.
He wasn't even thought of as a WC probable before the South Africa ODI Series.
4 wickets on an apology of a track and Dhoni has warmed up to Piyush Chawla.
In a batting card that reads: Sachin, Sehwag, Gambhir, Kohli, Yuveraj, Pathan, Dhoni, Bhajji and Zaheer Khan...
"This is what we hear": Chawla needs to contribute with bat too: Dhoni
What about Yuveraj, Raina and Dhoni himself ?
Dhoni aka Mahi is the Head of Team India. Hence whatever he utters becomes Maheadlines !
We are living in weird yet exciting times.
We can expect more and more Maheadlines...
Yuveraj needs to take 5 wickets more often
Sachin needs to score more ODI centuries than anyone
Pathan needs to win more matches from any position
Sehwag has to improve his strike rate while batting 50 overs
Ashwin is too tall for a spinner, he needs to get shorter
Munaf has to cut down on speed while bowling and running
Zaheer has to lead from the front and then back too
Sreesanth shouldn't open his mouth to appeal or even to eat Appam
Gambhir needs to bowl his leg-spin more regularly
Virat should improve his wicket-keeping skills
Nehra's teeth need to visit a Dentist before the Final
Raina needs to change his gear [Does it mean the CSK gear ?]
Bhajji should remember he hasn't scored an ODI Century
And...
I think I must give more tips to my team-mates
S-Pun Doctor
He wasn't even thought of as a WC probable before the South Africa ODI Series.
4 wickets on an apology of a track and Dhoni has warmed up to Piyush Chawla.
In a batting card that reads: Sachin, Sehwag, Gambhir, Kohli, Yuveraj, Pathan, Dhoni, Bhajji and Zaheer Khan...
"This is what we hear": Chawla needs to contribute with bat too: Dhoni
What about Yuveraj, Raina and Dhoni himself ?
Dhoni aka Mahi is the Head of Team India. Hence whatever he utters becomes Maheadlines !
We are living in weird yet exciting times.
We can expect more and more Maheadlines...
Yuveraj needs to take 5 wickets more often
Sachin needs to score more ODI centuries than anyone
Pathan needs to win more matches from any position
Sehwag has to improve his strike rate while batting 50 overs
Ashwin is too tall for a spinner, he needs to get shorter
Munaf has to cut down on speed while bowling and running
Zaheer has to lead from the front and then back too
Sreesanth shouldn't open his mouth to appeal or even to eat Appam
Gambhir needs to bowl his leg-spin more regularly
Virat should improve his wicket-keeping skills
Nehra's teeth need to visit a Dentist before the Final
Raina needs to change his gear [Does it mean the CSK gear ?]
Bhajji should remember he hasn't scored an ODI Century
And...
I think I must give more tips to my team-mates
S-Pun Doctor
Monday, January 17, 2011
Neighbor's Envy, Owner's Pride ?
*
Neighbor's Envy ? Yes
Owner's Pride ? Unfortunately Not !
India's World Cup Team has been announced. Some surprises never manage to surprise us. We know there will be surprises. We just have get ready to be surprised. Remember Sunil Valsan ? He has a distinction which even Sachin Tendulkar doesn't have. He was part of a World Cup winning team.
On every tour, we should carry a reservation candidate. Right now, Saha is the one in South Africa. Piyush Chawla it will be, for the WC-11. The OBC perhaps. How did he manage to get in there is a question only Srikkanth and Co will be able to answer.
Why does Sreesanth find himself out of favor and perpetually unfit and of late profligate Nehra retain his place is a big surprise too. No one grudges Munaf Patel's selection, but this team has at least 5 men in the 'wounded soldiers' list. Sachin, Sehwag, Gambhir, Praveen and Zaheer are the names. Do we have worthy replacements ? What will happen if 3 or 4 or all of them fail to recover ?
With Dhoni having more faith in any Tom, Dick and Harry compared to Pathan, it won't be a surprise if they go for 5 bowlers scheme of things. That should give some hope for Chawla. Else, he will not be playing a single match during the Cup.
As I was wondering over the selection issues, I was tickled by THIS ! Howsoever stupid might be their Head Butt; Pakistan Cricket is a marvel to be marveled about. They have demolished New Zealand in New Zealand, within a month of the Kiwis' tour of India where the fancied Indians were made to sweat and grind on home soil.
This is practically Half-B Team of Pakistan. Yunis Khan, Misbah ul Haq and Umar Gul are the only players from the possible best Pakistan -11 playing here. In spite of that, they have crushed the Kiwis in the first test and done so quite handsomely. Coming to second test, Pakistan are on the verge of a series win; their first since 2006.
We are talking about Australia missing their greats and how they are suffering. We also see how South Africa miss Kallis and India miss their 'Stars' every time they lose. Murali-less Sri Lanka become tooth-less Tigers. Pakistan are playing without almost entire team thanks to several problems and Ejaz Butt. But they still can win.
I salute the 'Spirit of Pakistan Cricket' ! And also the ever enthusing talent pool ! If only they had a proper system, they would have been the team to beat. Why doesn't someone bump off the Butt and some more of those Mismanagers of PCB ? They have so much talent at their disposal even for this job ! After all Butt is a Blasphemy on Cricket !
Still, in spite of all their problems; for me, Pakistan will be the dark-horses for WC-2011 !
S-Pun Doctor
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