Rohit Sharma: Demand for a DNA Test !

After finding nothing interesting to write on Cricket for over 100 days, I return to write on Cricket because of the magnitude of the event that is happening right now.

I have always considered Dhoni as an extremely recalcitrant Captain who will play some of his favorites with the 'come what may' attitude and will keep some away with equal passion. He has done that with Ravindra Jadeja before and now it is Rohit [Nohit] Sharma. Everyone following Cricket in India must have felt dismayed to see the name of Rohit in the India list this afternoon and Rohit hasn't belied our belief in him !

So much so, even people not even remotely connected to Cricket have expressed anguish, anger and exasperation. Here are some of the reactions pouring in as India slide towards another defeat thanks to a middle order batsman who can't score a run but can't be dropped either.

Anna Hazare: I have decided to go on an indefinite fast till Rohit Sharma is dropped from the team. Cricket is sustained by the Aam Aadmi's money and not by the BCCI, Selectors or the Captain's whims. We need a strong Jan Team-Pal bill. This bill will ensure that the Indian team for every match will be selected by people's vote.

Rahul Gandhi: I will ensure 18% reservation for Muslims in the team. Yusuf Pathan, Mohammed Kaif, Mohammed Azaruddin and other Muslims just don't get chances while Rohit Sharma can go on and on because he is a Sharma.

Kapil Sibal: We can prove that this is NOT Indian National Team. This is Indian Notional Team. How can one man continue to enjoy immunity while others have to perish even if they perform.

Mamta Banerjee: This is all about Pawar Politics. This is clear injustice to Kolkotta, I mean Bengal. Manoj Tiwari doesn't get chances because he is from Bengal and Rohit continues to play because he has support of Mumbai lobby. We will protest and will withdraw support to the Central Government if the Prime Minister doesn't intervene in this matter.

Baba Ramdev: Rohit Sharma's kundli's are bad. He needs to concentrate and for that he has to come to me and I'll teach him Yoga and then he'll start scoring runs like the flow of Ganga !

Sachin Tendulkar: Rohit is very talented. He and Virat Kohli will break my record of 100 centuries. Mmmm, I mean, Virat might score about 90 and anyone who gets as many chances as Rohit can certainly score 10 centuries if he plays for 10 years. We can't forget Zimbabwe are back in the business. Together they will break my record.

Saurav Ganguly: I am seriously thinking of reconsidering  my retirement options. With my records, I can still come back into the team and I am not half as bad as this guy Rohit who has got more chances than Me, Manoj, Yusuf, Laxmi Shukla and entire Bengal team have got.

Sharad Pawar: All this is nonsense. Rohit is a very talented and Pawar-ful boy. He is miffed because he has not got the No. 2 position in the team. You give him that position and he will start raking in heavily.

Sunil Gavaskar: If we look carefully, Rohit has got bowled or LBW in last 3 matches. Which means he has got out to good balls. He hasn't thrown his wicket away because he values it. Give him some time to settle down; may be 2 - 3 years or 4 and he'll be fine.

Yusuf Pathan: I can win matches from any position. But to win matches, I have to get chances to win from any position. Rohit is failing from any position he bats and I have to just sit and watch from any position.


M. S. Dhoni: Well of course, these things happen in Cricket. He's a brilliant player going through a bad patch. We're confident, he'll overcome that. And you must remember I am a wicket-keeper and just can't afford to drop ! We might think of resting Sehwag in next match to accommodate Manoj Tiwari who might be rusting !

Rahane, Tiwari and many others: We demand DNA test for Rohit Sharma too to find out "Yeh kaunsa bade Baap ka Beta hai !"







SPun Doctor Also blogs @ http://diehardcricketfans.org/category/contributed/govind-raj-shenoy/

WTF - The Pressure is always on India !

Before India - England group match, Strauss said, "The Pressure is on India. They are playing at home". England tied a match they should have lost first and then won easily. Both teams choked and out-choked each other for a tie.

Smith was quoted, "It is a big match. The Pressure is on Indians. We are coming from a series win against them. They are playing at home and that can act against them". South Africa came back strongly from a lashing and restricted India. But then choked in the middle and would have lost but for some luck towards end.

Smith said during the series prior played on South African grounds, "The Pressure is on India. They are known to be susceptible on fast and bouncy pitches. We will go all out at them". India tied the Test series 1-1. Won the T-20 and lost the ODI series 3-2 with a depleted team.

Sammy said, "We will target the chinks in the Indian batting. We will go all out for a win. The Pressure is on Indians". Chasing 269 for a win, West Indies collapsed from 153 / 2 and lost by 80 runs.

Even minnows love to have a go at India. Shakib al Hassan said, "We won against them the last time. So the Pressure is on the Indians". Viru and Virat plastered Bangladesh bowlers and India cantered home in spite of an off color bowling.

We have seen almost all Captains playing against India coming up with almost same pre-match / pre-series quotes. So much so, Saurav Ganguly once said, "Yes, the Pressure is always on us. When we play at home, the Pressure is on us because we are playing in front of huge huge crowds with huge expectations. When we play away from home, the Pressure is on us because we are playing on fast tracks and in alien conditions. I would like to know when the Pressure is on others !"

If India lose, everyone can say, "We said so. Didn't we ?"

When India manage to win at home in spite of all this unbearable Pressure; they say, "Well, they always play well at home and are a formidable team in these conditions".

And when India manage to win abroad against all odds and in spite of all the Pressure; what do we get to hear... ?
"Well, they did play well. We could have done with a little bit of luck here and there"
"We didn't play up to our potential"
"Well, it is tough, we let ourselves down"
"A few decisions too went against us"
"We just had one bad session and lost the match"
"We had a bad day in the office. We will come back hard"
"Well, nothing went according to our plans. But we will work out strategies to hit back"

Why is it that 'The Pressure" is always on India ? WTF ?

And today, Australia believe the 'Pressure' is on India. Because there are a lot of expectations and they are playing at home...



SPun Doctor
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