Indian Cricket is so very complex: Quite like Harbhajan Singh's Technique. You can never say Bhajji lacks technique. But neither can you you say he has it. Just like Team India. You can't say they are No. 1 Test Team. You can't say they aren't No. 1 either !
They always play on level ground: They play every opponent at their level; that is the opponent's level. Never expect Team India to crush weaklings. Never expect them to capitulate easily against the best. There will be a fight. Nothing less, nothing more.
Why is the Indian middle order confused ? Answer is simple. First Jatman Viru Sehwag goes out and bashes everything in sight as if he were Dharmendra and the bowlers, the baddies. And then Rahul Dravid comes out with his brand of Gandhigiri and refuses to hit anything ! No wonder Dhoni, Raina and even Sachin look lost in the middle.
The Great Indian Run Rate: India have over the past 3 years maintained a better run rate compared to all other teams in Tests. What is the secret ? This has been partly explained above. Sehwag wags to attain a strike rate of 100% or an average of 6 RPO. Dravid lags and attains a strike rate of 25% or about 1.5 RPO. The other confused lot fall in between at 42% or 2.5 RPO. Thus India manage to keep the total scoring rate above 3.3 RPO.
The All Rounders problem solved: Bhajji is the answer to India's long standing prayers for a Batting All-rounder. Sending him to bat at No. 8 is a master-stroke. India's middle order actually starts here with very competent batsmen like Zaheer, Ojha and Sreesanth to follow. And just think of it, Ishant Sharma is not even playing. What an embarrassment of riches.
Suresh Raina finally has arrived as the Bowling All-rounder. So what if he has got more wickets than the runs he has scored of late ? Anyway we now have two genuine All-rounders !
Taking responsibility, Indian style: Whenever Team India are in trouble, someone or the other stands up to be counted. The 'Someone' is Laxman and the 'Other' is Harbhajan Singh !
This series is not about the 50th Century: Whom are they trying to fool ? Every member of the Team is so preoccupied with this number, they have actually forgotten there is a Test series going on. Anything else happening out there is an irritant. No wonder the Kiwis have taken flight after being grounded by Bangladesh !
Then some 'Random' acceptance Speeches...
Bhajji: People threw brick-bats at me and I used the bricks to construct Milestones in Mohali and the bats to score two centuries !
Gambhir: I owe my performance in this test to Viru and Rahul. While Viru went on like Viru, nobody noticed me. Those who did notice, thought Rahul batted left handed at the other end.
Dravid: I am relieved now because there is someone to take over my mantle now. I was totally confused while I watched Gambhir bat. I often felt I was out there in the middle and batting left handed.
Sehwag: New Zealand is an ordinary team. It is just that some of us are wasting too many four balls. I have to make up for everyone including Sreesanth. I would prefer if Bhajji comes out to bat at No. 3 and Rahul comes out only if we have to face follow on.
Raina: I play my natural game as Dhoni has asked me to. What if they keep three men on the boundary ? I can always come back and play the next innings or the next or the next...
Laxman: I enjoy playing under pressure. I am forever indebted to my team-mates for providing me with ample opportunities to do so. It is such a pleasure, almost like sitting inside the pressure cooker used by my Mom to prepare idlees. What if you are steam cooked practically every test ? Idlees do taste Delicious !
Dhoni: We have to accept we have not batted well and our bowlers have tried their level best to match the batsmen. Our fielding can be better and the wicket-keeping particularly needs some improvement. Overall though I am satisfied with our performance. You win some, you draw some and you can always drop some catches.
McCullum: Bhajji inspired me to go for the Double Ton. If he can score two hundreds in two innings, I can score two hundred in one innings. Impossible is nothing !
Vettori: We have come back strongly after the Bangladesh debacle. Aussies lost 2-0 in 2 Tests in India. So we are better than them now. I believe my new born baby deserves all the credit for this.
And last but not the Least !
Curator: I hoped I will be remembered as the man who prepared the pitch on which Sachin Tendulkar scored his 50th Hundred. Alas, Everyone else scored here except Sachin !
S-Pun Doctor
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